Famous actress and new mom Kaley Cuoco, best known for her role in The Big Bang Theory, recently expressed on a podcast how she gets a “visceral angry reaction” when people say things like “hey, mama” or “looking good, mama” to her.
Kaley Cuoco is expressive about how much she adores her daughter Matilda and loves being a mother, but what she does not love is being called “mama” by fellow adults. The famous actress is absolutely not alone in feeling this way. Kaley Cuoco expressing her anger and frustration towards being called “mama” by fellow adults speaks to a vast group of women and new moms who feel that their identity is lost when they become mothers.
Being referred to as “mama” rather than your name just because you had a baby can be very off-putting, as it makes women feel like who they are as an individual is completely disregarded now that they have a child.
Kaley Cuoco makes another good point on the podcast about how it seems like as soon as someone knows you have a child, all of a sudden “you look good!” As if you are expected to look awful after having a child!? The actress made a sarcastic comment on the podcast in regards to when people say “looking good, mama” it feels like they’re actually saying “wow you’re alive and walking!!!” or “you’re out in the world!?” As if it’s so wild that a new mom could be doing well and thriving.
You see how this could be insulting now don’t you? It is totally valid for Kaley Cuoco to feel this way and for any new mom out there to feel this way too!
It's a topic that's growing in both awareness and vocalization too! (I recently read an article published by PureWow about new moms not liking being called mama - completely unrelated to Kaley Cuoco’s statements - which prompted me to get wrtiting on this blog article for you today).
See, a lot of us are feeling this way!
Some moms don’t like being called mama either because when a grown adult calls them mama they think, “I’m not your mom so why address me differently?”
Point taken. VALID!
The transition into motherhood is exactly that, a transition. It’s not a full identity change, it’s not saying goodbye to everything you ever were before this baby, it’s a transitional period in which motherhood becomes a part of your life. Not your entire life.
That’s why having everyone in your life make such an easy switch to start calling you “mama” all of the sudden (and all of the time) can be extremely frustrating and even aggravating for new moms going through this transition. Of course the people calling you this are just trying to be supportive, and “mama” is seen as a term of endearment, so it is all likely that they just don’t know how it makes you feel.
Just because you’re now a mother does not mean anything about you has changed. Your personality, your identity, your life outside of your little one…you’re still 100% you. Being a mother is a part of your identity that has many other parts to it and the PureWow article makes a beautiful point about how having a strong sense of self and being confident in who you are to your core will only make you a better person for yourself, and a better mother.
All of this mama-drama is the exact reason why I made Rumbly.
Rumbly is 100% focused on YOU - both the woman you are and the mom you’re becoming - from pregnancy through your fourth Trimester. How you experience the transition to motherhood impacts the years to follow with your little one. I know the experience is full of inevitable ups and downs, which is also why Rumbly promises to be a constant cheerleader and support in your life during pregnancy.
Pregnancy is a precious time in your life to honor the woman you are, and to support and celebrate inviting motherhood into your life! It's an addition, not a switch, and it shouldn’t stop once you deliver your baby, it should continue forever.
So, if you don’t like being called mama…tell them to cut it out girl! You can be whoever you want to be. And tell them to order you a Rumbly Gift Box for the hassle. 😉
